Blog

Writing is part of my meditative process to clarify my thoughts, to align my actions and to focus on my purpose. I write about my emotions, my shortcomings, and my ideas for a better world through poetry, prose, and what I call rantifestos every day, some of which I post here on my blog and on social media. I share them to help others move along their paths to live and lead with compassion.

The Weaponized American Dream

Some people were born on third base
and go through life thinking
they hit a triple.
Barry Switzer

Not only was he born on third base, never held a bat, his dad owns the stadium and the team–the Meritocracy Mets! 😊

We all might know some trust fund babies. Or people who have been given everything their entire lives. I’ve been to weddings that are corporate mergers and worked with people who are amongst the most privileged humans on the planet. And every one of them has a story about their hero’s journey of slaying the dragons, overcoming the odds and the work ethic it took to succeed. It is human nature for all of us to spin a story, an amazing self-congratulatory, self-preservation story about what “I did” to earn, and deserve “my success”, no matter how much privilege we’ve enjoyed. And I have also worked and know those who have come from virtually nothing and suffered through real hardship to claw their way to the top. These are amazing stories that truly come from lived experiences that can inspire and give hope to others. We can fall in love with these stories, wonderful versions of the American Dream.

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Stop Blaming COVID!

We have been in isolation, wearing masks, social distancing, vaccinations, zooming etc. For those of us not in denial, we realize most of this will not change. That we are forever changed by these experiences and that our future health and well-being depends on our adaptability not our non-sensical “return to normal” and our clinging to nostalgia.

Many of us are navigating this crazy world the best as we can. Yet many others are hiding beneath the sheets of “gratitude” and “privilege” of their COVID bed. Using the real uncertainty, anxiety, and health crises of this time as lame excuses for not moving forward with their lives.

Stop blaming COVID for your pre-COVID career co-morbidities– your laziness, your procrastination and deferral of the pursuit of a life that is true to yourself.

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Questions don’t make you curious

A friend of mind equates having questions to being curious. We all have questions, but most of ask them like a lawyer at a deposition—“Never ask a question if you do not know the answer.” We spend so much time avoiding the “stupid question”, nodding our heads when we have no clue. As we age and our ego dominates, we prefer to look smart than learn anything. Questions do not make you curious.

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Trickle Down Mental Health

We live in a society where our health is an afterthought. We subscribe to a trickle-down theory for our well-being. We are told to fit in, to conform, to assimilate, and to get along. This crazy tension between these pressures and who we are, want to be and are meant to be, undermines our well-being. So much of our society tries to push us into molds behind the façade of independence and individuality. As the old Asian proverb espoused, “The nail that sticks up will be hammered down.” Expectations to go to college, buy a big house, nice car, get promoted, buy more things, the kids go to college and try to outdo their parents and the vicious cycle continues. The stock market soars, GDP rises but we feel like we have more debt than dreams. A recent study of adolescents showed that suppressed “meaning” and “dreams” were the sources of their anxiety. Can you hear the hammers? 

So much of our society operates from a trickle-down mentality.

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Island Fever

Separating ourselves from the “other” has been the plight of humanity and part of our storied evolution. Tribes, territories, and Darwinian strategies to cull the herd.  I think therefore I am. There is no WE in survival. I must separate myself from the “inferior” people who dilute the march towards progress.

Covid, voting, giving time, money, religion, parenting, social media, race, gender, disability can spawn mythical islands of isolation and separation. Dream-like places where we are all powerful, we control everything and conveniently eliminates our dependency on so many people and resources. An island oasis that is superior because it has exiled the unwashed bad apples.

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Ego: The Enemy of Empathy

For the Ego kills the ability to feel the pain of others. For this is the test of our own struggles. Do we feel in our hearts and our bodies what others are experiencing? Or do we rationalize it? That is the Ego doing it’s dirty work, making the tragedies of the world explainable, justifiable and fixable. And therefore not MY problem. The further we remove ourselves from the ills of the world, because we can’t let them interfere with our self-important pursuits, our true inner selves are submerged beneath our separateness from the world and each other. And our best self, our virtuous self, gets sedated and suppressed.

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Back to whose normal?

Most of us are trying to avoid the phrase, “return to normal”. Even newscasters, pundits, leaders of all types are making awkward statements about “a partial, a semblance, a return to some normalcy….”

Part of this recognizes the mountain ranges of reality that now exist between the valleys of our ignorance.

Our collective awakening, our shared despair, guilt and confusion make a return to “normal” impossible.

These powerful forces and circumstances have brought us to this moment, to this place, and we can never go back.

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We Are the Sky

Only when it is dark enough can you see the stars. Martin Luther King Jr So the darkness is not only necessary but essential for

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